I love music. I pretty much love all kinds from contemporary Christian to heavy metal, rap to country, hip hop to classical. I find myself seeking out new music all the time.
This week, not one, but 2 new songs that I found really spoke to me. Ironically, they spoke to me in the same way:
They both made me look at my life and look at what I am letting to hold me back.
There is so much more that I want out of life than just getting up, going to work, driving home, short time with family, rinse and repeat.
When I want something, and I mean truly want something, I go after it with everything that I have. I wanted to finish the basement, I worked on it every night. I wanted to learn guitar. I watched every youtube video that I could get my hands on until I was playing on the worship team. I learned photography by reading book after book, article after article.
For years, we have been wanting to go on a vacation. Steph and I talked about places that we wanted to go. I budgeted the money. I planned a route to be able to go to most of them. I gave up the fight and traded in my truck so that we could have a more comfortable vehicle to go in. I built a bed cover to secure our luggage. I went after this vacation with everything that I had.
For 1659 miles, we went on the most incredible vacation and made memory after memory. We went to a Blues game in St. Louis. We met my good friend and mentor Shan. We got to see Steph’s friend Tracy in Ohio. We saw the Air Force Museum and the Ark Experience. We spent 10 days traveling around just us making memories.
I wanted us to go on a vacation and I was passionate about it. It was so worth every minute of planning and every dime spent in preparation. Nothing can take away those memories. We didn’t let anything hold us back, not even 43 degree weather.
But listening to the 2 songs, “Defying Gravity” from the musical Wicked and “Fight Song” by Rachael Platten, made me realize that there are things in life that I use as a crutch to hold me back and that its time to fight for what I want out of life.
I use the house as an excuse to not move where God wants to use me…
I use not having a bachelor’s degree hold me back in my career…
I use the excuse of not going to seminary hold me back in ministry…
I hold my lack of training in computers from seeking a new career in technology…
The list of things I am missing out on due to fear is long…
This year, I will turn 48. 50 is around the corner. When I was young, 50 seemed so old to me. Now not so much, but the truth is, my life is over half way done if I lived to be older than what I imagine I will live to be. There are so many things yet to do on my bucket list, and yet I am letting life hold me back.
It’s time. It’s way past time to get moving and stop letting life, hold me down. Its time to “defy gravity” and use that one match to start and explosion. Its time to eat that elephant, one bite at a time.
Like a small boat
On the ocean
Sending big waves
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion – Fight Song
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